Internal Family Systems for Inner Work: A Nervous-System Guide to Parts

Parts work begins by changing the quality of attention

The quality of the relationship that we have with our parts, our inner family, it governs how we show up for the people and the things that we care about most.

This guide draws on Derek Haswell’s session, Experiencing the Life-Changing Magic of Internal Family Systems.

The way that we're relating to ourselves and to happiness itself matters as much as the outer conditions that we're building.

Every part usually carries a positive intention

There are no bad parts, all of these parts carry some positive intention for us.

No part is 100 percent right, no part is 100 percent wrong either, they are each holding some need of your system.

Tune into the body and find a presence anchor

Some folks will literally hear voices, and some folks it comes through somatically, there's expansion, there's contraction, the body becomes a kind of conduit for these things.

Find some aspect of your experience that feels steady or grounded or supported, some way that you feel grounded.

Ask the protective question before you try to change the part

If you changed in the way that you're hoping, what are you afraid would happen, what might happen in being successful there that feels like it might work against you.

Thank this part in whatever way feels authentic to you.

Practice

Run a parts check-in

Follow steps Derek takes you through in the session to get curious without pushing change.

1. Write an area where you feel stuck. Put a brief title at the top of the page for one important stuck area.
2. Describe the desired end state and how you'd like to be. Note what you want to happen and how you want to show up navigating it.
3. Ask the protective question. Ask, if you changed in this way, what are you afraid would happen, what might work against you.
4. Turn the two sides into parts and name them. Capture which part wants the change and which resists it, give each a simple name or image.
5. Find a presence anchor, meet one part, ask its highest intention, and thank it. Keep contact with a steady bodily anchor while you notice sensations or images, ask what the part wants, then offer brief gratitude.

Derek reminds participants that you have a right to confidentiality about what shows up in the work.

Free assessment

Map your nervous system patterns.

Take the Free Assessment

Continue exploring

• Browse the Nervous System Mastery masterclass guide library for more masterclass guides.
• Explore Taking in the Good for a complementary practice in resource encoding.
• Read Reset Your Nervous System if parts work becomes too activating and you need a simpler downshift.